low-key panic. Preferred color palette is hot magenta, lime green, and unexpected dusty lavender.
quick tropical smoothies are literally the only reason i’m still alive some mornings, no cap.
it’s 8:42 am right now in my dumb little apartment in pittsburgh and it’s gray and gross outside and i’m wearing the same hoodie i slept in and honestly these quick tropical smoothies are the only sunshine i’m getting today. Quick Tropical
Why i can’t quit my 5-minute tropical smoothie addiction even though i’m a mess
last tuesday i was so late i blended a quick tropical smoothie WHILE brushing my teeth. don’t judge me. there was mango on my ceiling. my roommate sent me a picture of the splatter pattern and captioned it “modern art.” i hate him. Quick Tropical
i used to be that person who bought $14 cold-pressed juices and pretended i had my life together. now i just yeet frozen fruit in a blender and call it self-care. growth? https://www.nutribullet.com/shop/blenders/nutribullet-pro-900/
The recipes i actually make when i’m half dead inside Quick Tropical Smoothies
the “i woke up in hawaii” quick tropical smoothie (my daily go-to)
- like a cup of frozen mango (aldis bag ftw)
- half a banana that’s basically brown but whatever
- coconut milk (the canned kind i keep forgetting to put away)
- handful spinach because guilt
- splash of orange juice i found in the back of the fridge blend and pray
The barbie dreamhouse dragonfruit one that slaps too hard Quick Tropical Smoothies
okay so dragon fruit + frozen berries + coconut water + greek yogurt = the pinkest drink you’ve ever seen. i spilled it on my white shirt last week and it looked like a crime scene. 10/10 would do again. Quick Tropical
The “i ran out of everything normal” emergency quick tropical smoothie Quick Tropical Smoothies
- canned pineapple (don’t use the syrup kind unless you hate yourself)
- whatever frozen fruit is left
- almond milk Quick Tropical https://www.melissas.com/products/dragon-fruit
- a spoon of peanut butter because why not at this point tastes like a candy bar had a baby with vacation. weirdly good.
Real mistakes i’ve made so you can feel better about your life
- put the blender on without the lid TWICE. my kitchen looked like a fruit massacre.
- added fresh ginger once. thought i was gonna die. burped fire for an hour.
- tried to “meal prep” smoothies on sunday and they all turned brown and sad by wednesday. never again.
Gear i actually use (sorry not sorry) Quick Tropical Smoothies
my nutribullet single-serve thing is the only reason i’m not late every single day. here’s the exact one if you also suck at life: this one fr (yeah affiliate whatever rent is brutal) Quick Tropical Smoothies
anyway quick tropical smoothies are my emotional support drink and if you say they’re “too much work” we can’t be friends. five minutes. you pee for longer than that. Quick Tropical
which one are you trying?? tell me your worst blender disaster in the comments i need to know i’m not alone in this chaos 🥭
